800 Contest Announcement: Build Me A Blog - Hop!

You guys continue to amaze me with your awesomeness, and for that, I'd like to thank you all for joining me on this cosmic writing journey. Because we're inching towards 800 members (I want to give this enough time for exposure), I figured, hey, why not announce my octennial-member giveaway now? But then I wondered, how am I going to do it this time? I considered what I've done before:

Free Books? ... Nah.

Gift Cards? ... Nah-huh.

A piggy-back ride at the next writer's conference?

...

Tempting, but ... *shakes head* nope!

Then it occurred to me, as I looked at my blog, what I'd do. When it comes to designing, I have a hard time putting images to paper so people can see what I see, but a few talented people have helped The Cosmic Laire become a visually fun place to visit that frames what I do best - write, and the results are stupendous! Instead of another giveaway, and to say thank you to all, we're holding this contest:

Welcome to Build Me A Blog - Hop!

Here's how this monkey's going to swing:

- Join this blog (if you already have, that's one less step!).

- Copy the button. Post it on your blog (link back to this post).

- Sign the Linky at the end of this post (closes Dec 19th).

- On December 20th, by 8 AM MST, include in your post a 200 word description of your dream blog/site/banner/avatar/etc. What would it look like? I'll read all the entries and select three winners who wowed me so much that I want to see their description come to life!

Winners will be announced December 24th, and the prizes are:

3rd place: a banner/icon/avatar designed by Tara Tyler.

2nd place: a banner/icon/avatar designed by Darren Hansen.

1st place: a blog background designed by Lisa Campbell ($50 value).

The best Runner Up will receive a rare box of Hostess cupcakes!

(Yes, it's real. No, it hasn't expired yet)

As a followup prize, my inbox will be open to query critics to anyone who wants one (all day, Wednesday 26th). This is a great opportunity to whip your NaNoWriMo query into shape before agencies open their doors for submissions after the holidays (or before the end of the world, whichever happens first), so please, take advantage. Those agents will greatly appreciate it. Details to come on the 26th.

Here's some background info on our master-designers:

Tara Tyler is amibicerebral with an alter ego as a high school math teacher - proving math is not so terrible and anyone can do it! She's had a hand at many jobs from waitressing to rocket engineering and has lived up and down the East Coast, currently rooted with three active boys and Coach husband in Ohio. Her sci fi thriller Pop Travel will be published by Curiosity Quills in 2013.

 

Darren Hansen is a graphic/web-designing wizard as well as the infamous creator of inkPageant.com, who writes urban fantasy and New Adult when he's not making code. He graduated from the University of Utah with a BFA in graphic design and enjoys designing, reading, writing, and playing ultimate Frisbee. He's also interested in creating new widgets for blogs and websites. He presently resides in Utah with his wife and three sons. 

 
Lisa Campbell is a writer and elusively talented web-designing ninja who writers whatever interests her at the moment. She changes her mind constantly and has too many hobbies, so you never know what she's going to do. But, I know she'll always love her family, friends, art, good stories, great humor, culture, language, and sushi.



All three of these wonderful people have touched this blog and turned it into gold, and they can do the same for you! So how about it?

If you have any questions, please ask in the comments below.

Spreading the word is extra credit and space-ogre repellant in one package, so be ogre-free! Tweet, facebook, blog, shout-from-the-rooftops! Dream your blog and may your odds be ever favored!

Thank you all once again, best of luck, and most of all, have fun!

I'm David, and I slay space-ogres for cosmic crullers!

Thanks, Tara!

I Read This: When I Grow Up - By Al Yankovic

Billy's classmates may have never considered careers in snail training or sumo wrestling before, but by the time the exuberant eight-year-old is done cataloging his dream jobs, they just might share his belief in unlimited potential! Virtuoso wordplay, irresistible rhythm, and laugh-out-loud humor abound in the first picture book by the one and only "Weird Al" Yankovic. This unbridled celebration of creativity and possibility invites readers of all ages to consider afresh what they want to be when they grow up (from goodreads).

*     *     *

Some of you might already know that I have a soft spot for the parody talents of "Weird" Al Yankovic, and I don't normally review picture books on this blog, but when I browsed the bookstore and noticed this by the kid's section, I did a double take. "Wait ... he wrote a picture book?" I asked myself. Sure enough, I picked it up and flipped through it, and was greatly impressed. It felt like reading a Dr. Seuss book, being absurd and quirky as all get out, except with no made-up words (just a ton of made-up careers). It took five minutes to read. I simply had to buy it. That's what fans do, right?

But really, I think this is a modern, riotous classic!

Now I get to enjoy a fun little story with my kids, which has a surprisingly sweet ending. I've since learned that more books are on their way, too. So if you're looking for a short, sweet book for a little one in your life, this might be your ticket. You can find a copy here.

I'm David, and when I grow up, I'm gonna do all of these things!

Tuesday Tropes: The Darwin Award

Flynn parked his bike by the coffee shop and proceeded down the street. A young woman catches his eye. He turns around and walks backwards, just so he can check her out, oblivious to the curb only feet away and the bus that's about to turn around the corner ...

*Warning: This post is loaded with dark humor*

Named after the famous Charles Darwin who coined the phrase Natural Selection, The Darwin Award is the "award" given to someone who meets their demise through complete carelessness, thoughtlessness, or good old fashioned stupidity. Most of these incidents are accidents, but they are often regarded by society as easily avoidable and general common sense. There's even a real award given each year of the same name for those unfortunate to die in various ways.

This tends to be a sight gag favorable to comedies in movies and television. They do make brief appearances in literature. Don't expected victims to be main/supporting characters, like in The Other Guys. What do you do when the bad guy zip-lines from the highrise you're on? Aim for the bushes! Makes sense ...

At other times, a character may have too much on their mind and forget things, like running with explosives is not a good idea ...

You can be a smart person, or even a famous person, and still fall victim to this infamous award. Word for the wise ... I wouldn't recommend acting like a zombie during a zombie apocalypse ...

There really are incalculable ways of going about this trope, but given the low percentage of actual occurrences, it would be wise to use this trope as equally rarely, or if it serves a purpose (humor and shock value, mostly). If tastefully done, it can make for an unexpected twist of fate. Whichever way you go, just be sure to be safe out there.

Ever given The Darwin Award to one of your characters? How did the poor soul meet their demise? This is a dark post, isn't it?

I'm David, and there are SOOOO many dumb ways to die ...

Post: Turkey, Zoos, And Things That Go Boom!

As I sit down to write this post, the sensation of landing my butt in a chair feels incredibly novel - as a result of being on my feet for nearly the entire weekend! How did I spend my Thanksgiving weekend? You're going to think I'm nuts when I tell you this busy little tale:

Event 1: Turkey (and all that implies)

Spend the day with my wife's family and enjoyed a delicious, potluck-style turkey dinner with all the fixings - and I brought pie! I wasn't aware of the torture they were going to put us through by playing Just Dance right after. Imagine doing this on a full stomach:

(Note: all pictures that were taken of the event were confiscated to prevent laughing, pointing, and unwanted embarrassment).

Event 2: My First BF Experience!

As in, my first Black Friday experience (if you thought something else, I'm laughing with you). So, yeah - never done it before, but now that I'm 30 and clearly an adult, I thought I'd see if all the horror stories were true. They were! I hit WalMart first. Bad idea. In five minutes of being inside, I heard things breaking and saw people slip on vomit. I didn't stay long. And Toys R Us ... forgetaboutit! That line had to be a mile long - not worth it to save five bucks. The other places were a success (I won't say what I got or where, cause that would spoil it). In total, I was on my feet for six hours, waiting to get in and waiting to buy. So this is what scavenging feels like ...

Not sure if I'm up to do that again, but my wallet is (no, wallet - no)!

Event 3: Kick'en It At The Zoo!

After coming home and going to bed at 3 AM, I somehow managed to get up in the morning to visit The Hogle Zoo the next day. Pretty fun, I must day. A big section is closed for a giant exhibit they're building, but that's okay. They kidlets got to see some cool things, including a polar bear that liked to show off. And I have to tell you, there are fewer things in this world that are cuter than a "tired" baby elephant.

*courtesy laugh*

  

And after that, we hit one of our favorite stores (IKEA), for some grub and a few little things. Oh, and we also stopped by the new Cabela's to redeem a promised birthday present in the form of a rugged, western-style hat. So what do you think? How's my new hat?

Event 4: Read The Zombie Survival Guide in one Sitting!

Because I need to research zombies (in a further extent, surviving them), I picked up this modern classic from Max Brooks. I intended to read it for my next read, but I ended up reading the entire thing. Excellent book, and not just for surviving zombies, but for general personal preparedness. I'm going to have to write a love note to this book in my current zombie WiP somehow, cause it's a life saver. I can't wait for his movie to come out!

Event 5: Shooting Some Vintage Guns!

In continuing my research to combat the zombie apocalypse, I've been trying out various arms from family and friends so I can get a feel for what they feel like, sound like, and smell like. With only a few hours of sleep (not the smartest thing in the world, mind you), I got to try out an 80 year old bolt-action rifle. Check out the damage I did to this old laptop hard drive from 50 yards, and without a scope (not too shabby)!

Who wants me on their zombie team?

Event 6: Writer Party w/Tiana and Morgan!

Tiana Smith and Morgan Shamy hosted a writerly get-to-gather that went down without a hitch (and silly me, I forgot my camera, so you'll have to visit Tiana and Morgan's blogs for a visual recap of the event - you guys are posting your pics, right?). Oh, man. It was a special event. The famous Shelly and Chad were there, as well as Donna Weaver, Julia King (no relation ... I think ... but we could be CPing soon), L.T. Elliot, Carolyn Vawdrey, plus several others! Thank you again for hosting your home, Tiana (and for letting me horde the Reese's!). I lied. I stole this from Donna (don't sue me!).

Event 7: Family Time and Reflection

Being a Dad is great - not easy, but truly something I wouldn't trade. It helps having such smart and funny kidlets and an amazing best friend (aka - wifey) to share them with. I had much to be thankful for this weekend, with a lot of good things thrown at me after a string of not-so-great things, and that helps. It's a new week. The sun is out. I had pie for breakfast and I have a novel to write, so make way for a word count avalanche. It's time to bury this slippery slope!

*     *     *

Thank you again, either in person or online, for making a difference in my life for the better. You truly get me, which means a lot, being a mixed bag of tricks. There's a special announcement this Friday, the 30th, to show my ongoing appreciation and my need to give some serious payback (no virtual crullers this time - I'm cutting back).

Now let's kick some WiP ba-too-tay! Who's with me?

How'd your weekend go? What'd you do? If you Black Fridayed, did you survive the fray? Did Jimmy really fall into the well?

I'm David, and this house is clean!

Thanksgiving: Out For The Weekend - See You Soon!

The title pretty much said it all, but while you're enjoying (or waiting for) your weekend, I'd like to say that I'm very thankful for a few things that I just have to say. I just have to. I'm thankful for:

Abiogenesis - because primordial soup is tasty.

My Fam - because they encourage my eccentricities.

The Mrs. - because ... do I really need to say why? ;)

The Kidlets - because they have better taste than I do.

The people who've hit me 100,000 times since I started blogging (ow, my virtual shoulder!) - because that's a lot of hits!

My Cosmic Crew - because you make blogging such an awesome experience and manage to restore my faith in humanity, daily.

(Plus many, many, and a great deal many more things!)

Speaking of members *looks at the head count* it's almost giveaway time again (and do I have something special in store you for)! And this won't be a book giveaway, or a free lunch, or even a vile of Dino-DNA. You've never seen a giveaway like this, is all I can say.

So the sooner we get to 800, the sooner I can announce the big cheese. Now go have a great and safe weekend, everyone!

What are your plans this weekend? Turkey? Black Friday? Hiding? Writing? All of the above or something else?

I'm David, and this Assassin's Creed stuntman is "parkour!"

I Watched This: Moribito - Guardian of the Spirit

When word spreads that Prince Chagum carries a water demon in his body, he becomes the target of assassination by his own father. Knowing what is to become of her son, the queen seeks Balsa the spear wielder, the land's finest bodyguard, to take him far away from the kingdom and protect him for the rest of his life. As fate would have it, Balsa is on a personal mission to save eight lives in order to redemption herself of eight deaths she has caused.

Chagum would be the eighth.

*     *     *

We wrapped up another short and sweet series (and yes, it's Anime), clocking in at a decent 26 episodes, and you know what? I had no expectations, saw no trailers for it, noticed it was available in our Netflix, so I'm all, "sure ... why not give this one a shot." It turned out to be a wonderful surprise. I'm a huge fan of Earthsea and the film Princess Mononoke (my gateway to discovering that Anime isn't all about bad dubbing and forming balls of energy in your hands), so it was refreshing to find another Asian-themed high fantasy story.

As cool as European settings are, I like to shake things up a bit.

The show is based on the novels by Nahoko Uehashi, and while I have yet to read them, I really enjoyed the production of this fine series - clean/detailed animation, characters who favor brains over brawn, and the violence was non-gratuitous enough that we let The Boy watch it with us. The show is a "textbook" rendition of The Heroes Journey with all the classic roles in their place (warrior, healer, mage, etc), but it never felt old or tired. The magic, like a faint accent, added to the realism. There was even an episode that resembled the opening chapters of my Woven novel so close, I got worried for a second. Thankfully it was different enough that no rewrites were necessary.

Yessiree ... this is pretty much the kind of story I enjoy writing.

So the next time you're looking for an Anime fix, try this out for size. It often goes where you don't expect, which is always entertaining. Besides, heroines are super-in right now - and Bulsa kicks butt!

Seen any good shows lately? What are your recommendations?

I'm David, and Egg Eaters hate fire ... just so you know ...

Tuesday Tropes: Going Cold Turkey

It's Thanksgiving, but not for Thomas. Thanks to his addiction, he is homeless, without family, who would otherwise be at a table around a warm meal. Tonight, Thomas sits under an overpass with his last rock. Then, out of nowhere, Thomas smashes his fix with his heel, determined that next year will be different. He will get his life back.

Going Cold Turkey - an event when someone declares their independence from a substance or an addictive element, usually by destroying or throwing away the addictive element. Side effects include withdrawals, erratic behaviors and (in rare cases), self imprisonment. As opposed to real abstinence from an addictive element, in fiction, this is a relatively short- lived period, and the character usually ends up for the better. This is easier said than done.

There's even a 70's movie completely themed by this trope, noted by the poster for this post. It's hard to go wrong when Dick van Dyke is involved!

This trope has been used in a variety of ways with many common (and completely unthought of) elements that a character may deem destructive to themselves. If you know Eddie Dean's story, a man stuck on heroin from Stephen King's famous Dark Tower series, then you know how that worked out for him.

It's not always easy for a character to choose to Go Cold Turkey. Sometimes they are in a position where the element is not availible, as was the case with Charlie from Lost, also a heroin addict. Even when the stuff crashed on the island, he was able to keep away from it.

Ain't that right, Charlie? ... Charlie?

Don't do it, Charlie! 

This trope gets a bad rep for its use with drugs, but people can be addicted to and Go Cold Turkey from anything ... even pancakes!

"Eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat ..."

And then you have folks like my grandfather Powers, who smoked, and went Cold Turkey well before I was born. And then there's me, who had a bit of a gaming addiction that my wife patiently helped me bring to an end (yet another reason to love her). Believe me, it's hard, especially when this is about to come out soon (be strong!).

We're seeing forced Cold Turkey now as folks across the country suffer from Twinkie Withdrawals. Yeah, the Hostess company closed. Good thing I grabbed a few boxes before the official announcement went out (did I say that out loud? *hides boxes*), but you know, sometimes it's for the best. Sure, Cold Turkey is hard, and that makes for an interesting character struggle, and deep inside, we all want that character to win, but we'll still come to love him if he fails.

Ever had your character Go Cold Turkey? Have you? Is there someone you know who did this and succeeded/working on it?

I'm David, and I picked the wrong week to quit eating crullers!

Announcement: The Cheers, Cavanaugh Blogfestivus!

You've been dying to know, and now, the secret is finally out!

Welcome to the “Cheers, Cavanaugh BlogFest.” 

Have you ever attended a holiday party where you bump into the one person who's always been there for you throughout the last year? You’d want to thank them for being incredibly stellar, right? If there’s one person in the Blogosphere who you would want to say cheers to, who would it be?

For us, it was a no-brainer - Alex “no hyperlink needed” Cavanaugh!

Without being asked, Alex has become a blogging enigma, always helping hundreds of his fellow authors by announcing book releases, hosting guest posts, guest interviews and always leaving positive comments. We can’t have a live party for the Ninja Captain, but we can host a yuletide BlogFest!

Hosted by Mark Koopmans, Morgan Shamy, David Powers King and Stephen Tremp, this blogfest will run from December 10 - 12!

On those days, answer these four questions as creatively as you'd like:

·         In +/- 20 words, what does Alex look like?

 ·        In +/- 20 words, who could play Alex in a documentary (living or dead)?

·         In +/- 20 words, who does Alex remind you of?

·         In +/- 100 words, (excluding the title) write flash fiction using all these prompts: Cavanaugh, Ninja, IWSG, Cosbolt, Guitar. 

Any rules? Here's a few:

- Be a Follower

- Join the Linky List

- Post your 200 word contribution (on Monday, December 10, if you would)

- Have fun!

Two winners – chosen by Alex – will each win a prize:

FIRST PLACE: A signed copy of CassaStar. 

GRAND PRIZE*: A picture of Alex and a download of him playing the guitar (on the condition that his picture is NOT to be shared online). 

The Linky is open until Dec. 12, 2012. So, how about it? Ready to give back to the most deserving blogger in the universe and make his face go bright red? I'd pay to see that happen. Come join the fun!

I'm David, and guess who grabbed the last box of Twinkies?

Oh, How I Miss You Blogfest: Ending My Hiatus Battle

I have something very important to say to all of you ...

See. I told you I'd conquer those nose creatures from space (and the best part - I didn't have to sacrifice my life ... a la Randy Quaid style)!

But in all seriousness, I'm back and ready to bust some heads - metaphorically speaking. But first, I'm back just in time for the first ever Oh, How I Miss You Blogfest, hosted by none other than the auspiciously awesome blogger giants Andrew Leon, Matthew MacNish, and Alex J. Cavanaugh (I'd miss all of them if they stopped blogging, but since they're hosting, they don't count here - sorry, fellas).
 

Oh, and this is the official button.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Good stuff, eh (fyi, I'm usually a little loopy after a head cold - must be the increased blood circulation to the smart mass after all the dumb mass I had to dispose of ... tissue style!

What are we talking about again? Oh, yes ... the blogfest! I'd better tell you how this thing works. See, if there's blogger buddies I enjoy who haven't blogged in a while, this is my oppertunity to let them know I miss them. Also, this is a chance to let a few (and much better at it than I am) active bloggers that I would miss them if they had to stop for whatever reason. And while I have quiet a lot to choose from, all both fronts, I narrowed it down to these few:

Who I miss:

Brenda Sills. Why? Because she's got to be one of the warmest and hilarious gals you'd ever meet, and she's way ultra supportive to boot (no, not to a boot - you know what I mean). It's been a few months since her last post, and what I'd give to see another. You're missed!

The Dudely Trio, as in, Jared Peterson, Matthew Hayes, and Jackson Porter. Granted, these three famous authors in present teenaged form have things like school and junk to keep them busy from regular blogging. Totally understandable, but they're still missed!

Ruth Josse. In a way, Ruth's kind of my silent buddy during writerly get-togethers. Sure, I'm reckless and witty in print, but I tend to be somewhat reserved and quiet in person, but I always enjoy her posts and appreciate the quiet confidence she instills. You're missed!

Who I'd miss (if they stopped blogging):

Michael Offutt. The man knows his awesomeness. I'd be completely lost on what TV shows are worth watching without his insight. That and his blend of current youth culture, political, and other topics makes each visit special. You're a rock star, sir. You'd be missed!

Julie Dao. Thick and thin, she's always there with support in truckloads. And given how hard she's been at work with DL Hammons Write Club (whoops ... I talked about Write Club!), she manages the time to reach out, above and beyond. Thanks, Julie. You'd be missed!

Casey McCormick and Natalie Aguirre. Let's face it, what would we do without Literary Rambles? They've been so helpful with sponsoring authors and spotlighting agents that they're an invaluable resource. I'm not sure if they're thanked enough, but they'd surely be missed!

As for the multitude of so many bloggers I esteem and aspire, I both miss and would miss you all. It really wasn't until I started blogging when I realized how vast and competitive this writing world is, but I'm glad to see you all as friends rather than competition. Thank you all!

How's about a big virtual group hug, eh?

*big virtual group hug*

I'll be at full steam again on Monday, which is when we'll announce the big super secret blogfest that will take December by "storm!"

  See you guys then!

Did you miss me? Are you participating in this blogfest? Who would you miss or currently miss among your blogging buds?

I'm David, and this is a most random (and awesome) music video!

Hiatus: Attack of the Nose Creatures from Space!

Hey guys!

I think tiny little aliens have landed in my nose and are using their death rays to turn my brains into scrambled eggs. Kinda came out of nowhere, and I'm having a tough time thinking coherently (ever heard of the man-cold? It's serious business - don't mess with it).

So I have to take a short leave of absence to recruit what's left of my WCICU (White Cell Infection Control Unit) and lead them into battle to liberate the land of My-Noggin from these vicious invaders. It's going to be a "bloody" battle, I think. Not gonna be pretty.

If I'm not back to announce the super secret blogfest on the 19th, you'll know my army has lost the battle. But we'll win this battle.

*applies war paint*

 They may take my nose, but they will never take ... MY BODY!

*charge*

Update - I'm pleased as punch that you guys liked my I'm Thankful for my Readers blogfest entry and am shell shocked that I won. Thank you a googolplex-times over! You guys are the best.

Crazy how timing comes into play, doesn't it?

I'm David, and I need to write my posts in advance again!

Tuesday Tropes: Comfort Food

 
At the end of a long day, Janet wants to relax and cozy up with a ... wait a sec - they're gone! Janet scrounges and looks, but can't find her secret treat? Had the kids eaten them? The husband. She doesn't know, but if she doesn't get her fix soon, someone's gonna pay!

Comfort Food - a favorite food item that a character will often turn to in moments of stress or anxiety as a means to self sooth and provide ... comfort. It can take the form of a common commodity or a bizarre dish. It's a downright obsession!

It would be wise to stock up on your favorite confections, whatever they are. They're harder to come by during a zombie apocalypse ...

"Hmm ... Twinkies ..."

Comfort Food results after eating certain kinds of foods, frequently, as a child (homemade or storebought), which then develops into an euphoric, nostalgic state each time a bite is taken. If someone hasn't had this food in a while, it can smack them like a blast from the past.

"Mommy ..."

Chocolate is universally accepted as Comfort Food, given its healthy properties (unlike the milky, sugary variety), making its appearance frequently in stories and the desks of authors who write them. It's enough to lift any foul mood after a brief visit from dementors ...

"I need a King-Sized Hershey after this ..."

Characters have to eat. Food plays an important part in stories. They can say a lot about a character. Be it a simple treat, a glazed cruller, or something random, like a jelly bean and pickle sandwich, if it makes the character feel better, it served its purpose. Or, if that food item is taken away or hard to find, desperation can be quite ... delicious!

And since it's election day, you know we'll be munching ...

How you given your characters Comfort Food? What do you like to eat that relieves what ales you? Did I make you hungry?

I'm David, and real men get cheesburgers - not medical treatment.

I'm Thankful For My Readers: Who Ate My Pie Crust?

Hey, guys! Am I on time for Tara Tyler and VixLit's I'm Thankful for ... my Readers! blogfest? Good, because you guys are in for a special treat. I read with my kids a lot over the weekend and an unexpected metamorphosis took place within the ol'noggin - I can't stop thinking in rhyme! It didn't help that I got stuck with a character in a card game that requires you to speak in rhyme when it's on the table. That, mixed with a somewhat-true story at my first try at pumpkin pie, I couldn't help myself. So, as a way to say THANK YOU to my amazing readers (CPs, bloggers, Betas, Alphas, The Mrs, etc), you've been integrated into my first ever attempt at drafting a children's-style book - don't drink any beverage as you read ...

Who Ate My Pie Crust?!

By P. King Duck

Sugar and Cinnamon,

Nutmeg and pumpkin.
The counter top was set
for my first pie excursion.

Excited I was as I left the warm blender,
ready to pour soup in my "crusted" container.
I had laid it out nicely, whilst singing a song,
but to my gasping grief, the crust was gone!











Except for a small part, near my knife sheath,
the unmistakable markings of human teeth ...

"Who ate my pie crust?" I right away asked.
"A child, a monster ... a guy in a mask?"
The Boy didn't do it - he was taking a pee.
The Girl didn't either, for she was asleep.

I went and asked Peggy (she writes for cookies).
"Did you eat my pie crust?" (she is sooo sneaky)
"Pie is underrated, but I assure you it wasn't me.
You should ask Erin - cause she's a spy, you see!"

I asked her - no luck, so I expanded my riot,
by asking Alex Cavanaugh, a starship pilot.
"I hope you catch a red-handed culprit soon,
but I have 100 comments to write before noon!"

 









"Who ate my pie crust?!" I asked Michael - like that.
He blamed the whole thing on Schrodinger's Cat.

I bet Mark ate it, that Irish-Hawaiian prankster,
but he proved me wrong, hook, line, and sinker.

"Who ate my pie crust?!" I asked Mr. Dilloway,
followed by Julia, Shallee, and Samantha May.
"Don't look at us!" they all cried the same line,
including Jay, Kelley, and young Miss Madeline.

I asked hundreds more, but none had eaten it.
How could they? They're online. They hadn't see it!
Then The Mrs. saw me, pacing, frowning like a mutt,
and cried, "Hey, honey - what's that on your butt?"

Now I remembered - the crust, left on the stool,
the same stool I had sat on ... oh, what a fool!

"I ruined the pie crust?!" I couldn't be more dumb.
I meant to make pie - instead, I made a sticky bun ...

The "END!"

 *     *     *

Wasn't that delicious? If I had included every one of my amazing readers and CPs, the post would be longer than anyone would be willing to read, so keep in mind that I had all of YOU in mind while writing it. I live to write for you, so thank you for enduring my constant shlock and returning to this blog to see whatever nonsensical mischief I'm up to. You're the best. Believe it!

Update: Can't seem to catch a break! Seriously. Good thing I didn't sign up for NaNoWriMo or I'd have failed already. All the while, ideas continue to simmer and stew and my notes keep getting bigger and bigger. With luck and hope, I'll add more seriously-needed words.

This week, the blog is all about FOOD! Come back for seconds! 

How was your weekend? Who's ready to vote tomorrow? What books are you reading? Anyone care for some pie (we baked another!)?

 Yum!

I'm David, and I'm just a lonely zombie ...

(Someone make a musical of this, please?)

Aspiring Advice: Politics In Fiction ... And Real Life

If you haven't heard this yet, it's all true.

Star Wars: Episode VII is coming in 2015!

How is this possible, you may ask? I'll give you a small clue:

 "Hey! Where's Pluto?"

The Walt Disney Company made this possible with the purchase of this franchise and everything under the Lucasfilm banner. Now, if you're a huge SW fan (like me) this is a big deal. A mixed reaction is expected and understandable, and I wish the franchise well as it grows and continues to be an amazing stretch of the imagination. On top of all that, Mr. Lucas is giving most his $4 billion away. Nice one!

This, coupled with the election next week, it got me thinking. Lots of people love the original trilogy. The recent one? Not so much. For me, I enjoyed them and I'm glad the new trilogy doesn't surpass the old, since it would make the latter three not as cool. With acting, Jar Jar, and other things in the complaint list, I've yet to see or hear serious cripes with it's politics. In many ways, I feel that's where the strength of the prequels lie - depicting the fall of a galactic government.

And this, I feel, is the most powerful line of all those films:

Did you catch that? Applause. Not war. Not famine. Applause.

I remember watching that scene in theaters opening day. Those words chilled me to the core. The idea that such a huge governing body could be duped by a single Sith awed me, even though I was expecting it. Not too long ago, my good blogging/author friend Michael Offutt featured a post about the new Clone Wars season and brought up this relevant question: "How is it that Palpatine had the Jedi eliminated and the galactic populace seems fine with that?"

Let me add a little real world perspective on that ...

How did the 3rd Reich get away with eliminating so many people (mostly Jews) and most of the Nazi Party seemed fine with it?

It's not an overnight process, I can assure you.

In college, I had the chance to take a psychology class that focused, in depth, on Good and Evil - or rather, how people become good or evil. What motivated them to do so? It began with the premise that most people have the desire to do good. Life experiences (social, educational, economic, whathaveyou) has the power to reinforce this good or drive it to more nefarious purposes. People in Germany were not suddenly okay with mass murder overnight. It took decades of persuasion. The Old Republic in Star Wars didn't fall overnight either. It was already falling, well before Episode I began (taking down a government that big would require a thousand-year-old plan).

Am I saying liberty is going to die soon? Not at all, but it can't be taken for granted either. As history has already shown, politics and government have a cycle. Greek authors called it The Kyklos, a cycle of democracy, aristocracy, and monarchy (lather, rise, repeat). Today, there's the Tyranny-Liberty Cycle, which (so far) accurately describes the rise and fall of every major government in history, in the order of Liberty, Complacency, Dependance, Tyranny, and Revolution.

Let's see this cycle at work in Star Wars ...

Episodes I and II played out during the Complacency stage, as Palpatine put it “The Republic is not what it once was—the Senate is full of greedy, squabbling delegates. There is no interest in the common good.” Episode III showed the Republic's Dependance on the clone army, using it to "clean up" the mess left by the Separatists.

"What if the democracy we thought we were serving no longer exists, and the Republic has become the very evil we have been fighting to destroy?" (I think she was onto something ...)

Tyranny officially began when Moff Tarkin said "all remaining reminisce of the Old Republic have been swept away" in Episode IV. 

Episode V and VI is all about Revolution. Lather, rise, repeat.

Kudos to Lucas for dreaming up this complicated political dilemma.

But if sci fi is a precursor to sci fact, could this happen for real? It can and it has, in its own way. Ender's Game, after all, showed how social media could effect government well before the advent of Facebook.

Over the last couple of mouths, I decided to inform myself about my country (America) and the world as it stands today. I am astounded. I think it's completely fair to disagree with people, but the viciousness and divisiveness right now is at the worst I have seen in my 30 years of life. What has happened to civility? Did it ever exist or was the lack thereof hiding all this time? And in all the research I've done, I'm amazed how ill informed some are - or worst yet, misinformed.

This negativity is more than enough to make a little girl cry. 

We live in a great time where information, on just about anything, is readily available in our pockets. Unfortunately, every story has indefinite angles - they can be spun to have more. Fact Checkers have been reduced to semantic word plays. Death threats are somehow okay, so long as it's through Twitter. Articles (and history) have been rewritten to match or comply with current narratives.

The list goes on. I am hopeful, after November 6th, regardless of the outcome, the good nature that I have seen and know in people that has been absent these last few months will return. I won't deny, however, while I've been sitting quietly in the background watching all this happen, I have a better understanding of how people react to certain things, which I hope will make the politics in my fiction writing more believable. Being informed, even with sources we don't agree with, can enhance real and fictional perspectives. What's the advice?

Be informed, with multiple sources, and vote. Research and practicing the right to elect our government officials gives us the unique chance to increase our knowledge of how government works, can work, and in turn, allows us to participate in history. I'm glad to be part of it!

This is not the rule, just my thoughts on the matter. This blog isn't meant to sway anyone politically. There's plenty of other places to go for that, but I will say, to have a good understanding of the political spectrum, especially if we plan to use politics in our fiction, we have to branch outside of our leanings and look at the other side too, and try to understand without being on the attack. It's hard to persuade people when we call them a racist or a socialist, directly or indirectly, only because we disagree. We're better than petty name-callers.

Politics, on the other hand, make for excellent reading. Some of the best books out there are rich with them, such as Dune, Game of Thrones, and Mistborn. My works have a fair amount of politicking, especially my first round of sci fi attempts, Made for good drama. I wish you a great weekend and a greater week ahead. To my friends on the East Coast, I wish you well and hope you'll recover soon.

"May the ballot be with you!"

Looking forward to the end of this election? Do politics play an active role in your writing? What's your favorite politics-rich story?

I'm David, and the Solo kids had better have sabers, so help me ...